I received a call this afternoon that my kids' school is going to be closed tomorrow. They are having heating issues, and must close the school until repairs are made.
This past month, Peter has had 3 appointments, Rebekah has had 2 and I've had 1. That is all in 1 month. All of them were scheduled except for 1 (Peter's first breathing issue). William has helped out when he could. On top of this, we have had two snow days. This is all I can recall at the top of my head. And as you can see, it is a lot.
So as a working mom, I've begun to feel the working mom guilt. Am I doing my job justice? And today, for the first time in a very long time, I begun wondering if life would be easier if I didn't work.
I gave this a great deal of thought at the time. I decided that ultimately it is best for my family for me to work. There are lots of reasons for this, none of which I could properly explain. I admire those that do. I admire those that don't. I admire the women who are happy with their choice because sometimes making the choice is a difficult thing to do.
Today, on my way home as I was thinking about work, all the appointments, and the stress it has caused me, I wondered if it was worth it. Is it worth working?
I think everyone has these moments, no matter which choice they make in their life. Is the grass greener on the other side? In my case I'm certain it isn't. Sometimes, it just seems that way. I think everyone second guesses major decisions in their life at least once. So today my prayer is that God will help me find peace with my grass and help remind me all the great things about my pasture.
And tomorrow...well tomorrow I will again balance the difficult task of a good employee and a good mom simultaneously. I'll be thankful I have a great job that allows me to take on this difficult task. It'll be a messy chaotic day, but it will be accomplished.